Thursday, March 5, 2009

Create

           Last September I had a horrible, very rough week. I was discouraged. I felt like I was failing as a mother and as an artist. I was having a struggle of how to balance the two things I love in my life - art/designing and being a mom. I hadn't had a chance to create all week and I was wondering if I should just give up spending time on designing because it was frustrating me when I couldn't ever get any time in. I wondered if I should just let it go, if I would be happier and be able to spend more time being a better mom. I was praying for answers.
           That night I attended the General Relief Society broadcast for the women of our church. I went hoping for answers. The first three talks by the general Relief Society sisters were good, but they still didn't fill my empty heart and give me the answers I was looking for.
           That was until Elder Uchtdorf spoke. You HAVE to listen to the whole thing if you struggle with creativity in your life and feeling a need to create, or if you are a woman and just want to find happiness. It is called Happiness, Your Heritage given in October 2008. I can not describe to you the emotional and spiritual impact this talk had on me. From the moment he commented on talking to all those out there who are tired and exhausted... the spirit hit me and I was crying. I have never had an experience hit me more powerfully than listening to him. Every word from his mouth I felt was a very specific answer for me. I have never felt the love of the Lord personally for me so strong. I knew that God knew me personally. That he heard my prayer. That he knew my struggle. That he understood. He sent his answer through the mouth of his apostle. I still get choked up every time I hear this talk, every time I think about that experience.
           I know God lives. I know he loves us personally. I know he answers prayers. This talk was an answer to mine. I need to be creative. It is part of me. It's part of everyone. Even though at the time I felt like it was more towards designing and needing that. Lately I've realized that the greatest happiness I find is being creative with my family. Doing creative things that bless them. Isn't that was God does too. All of his creations are here to bless us. His family.

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